You are racist

 

I’m liking the provocative titles.

Well, what do you think? Are you?

What I wrote about last time made me examine myself quite a bit. I actually think my description of how I am was not completely accurate. As I’ve thought about it more, and (over) analyzed myself in other situations, I’m not sure my problem is about race. It may be to some extent, as I think many people have prejudices and biases that are unconscious. I think the bigger problem is my judgment of other people based on what they look like, or even what they are talking about. When I am suspicious of other people, it’s mostly because they look a little sketchy to me. But that is wrong. How can I accurately evaluate someone’s character based on how they look?

 

I’ve known this guy for a little while, and when I was around him he seemed aloof and reserved. I interpreted this as arrogance. However as I’ve gotten to know him better, I realize that he’s just kind of a quiet and soft spoken, and really not arrogant at all. I feel like I’ve learned this lesson before. How many more times before I actually figure it out?

 

So I guess my point is that we make judgments about people far too quickly. A groundbreaking assessment I know, but its something I’ve been thinking about.

 

Ok, a couple more quick things. Funny story- so I gave my mom the website address for this blog (hi mom!). And then I wrote the last post. I’m so stupid sometimes.

 

Check out this band called Menomena- they’re great. Listen to Muscle N Flow. Its an amazing song. And one more link.

I am racist…

Yep, I figured that out yesterday. I don’t like admitting it, but I know I have to in order to change.

You see, I moved to the Rainier Valley on Thursday. I have been looking forward to living here for a long time, and very seriously considered doing it this past year. Now I’m finally here, and it’s great. The best thing about this part of town is its diversity. I just read that two thirds of the residents here are African American or Asian. For the first time in my life I am a racial minority.

So, as I explored the Valley a little bit yesterday, I realized I was racist. It’s not a very fun thing to realize. It’s not huge, I don’t hate any race more than another. But I found myself more suspicious and cautious around groups of people that weren’t white. I think that’s a problem. I think that’s wrong. So I’m going to work on it.

A couple of interesting things happened as I was out and about. I went to shoot baskets at a nearby park last night. I played for a while, and then walked around the park and sat at a picnic table. Lots of kids were showing up, many different age groups represented. As one kid walked by (he was probably 7 or 8 ) he looked at me and said, “hey nigga, you seen my knife? You seen my knife?” A little at a loss, I mumbled a no and he walked past. As I walked out of the park, he said, “whats up?” I said, “not much, hows it going?” “Good.” Then as I walked away, “bye.” So not much, but who knows, maybe I’ll see this kid again and we can talk some more.

As I walked past a bus stop on the way back to my house a man I had seen earlier asked about the bus. I had no answer for him, as I hadn’t taken that bus before. I told him good luck and was a few steps away when I heard him say, “It was nice to see another white guy around here.” Again at a loss, this time I said nothing and kept walking. Why didn’t I think of something to say? I definitely did not agree with him, the thought hadn’t crossed my mind at all regardless of my earlier realizations. Here’s the best answer I can come up with now, “You know, that thought never crossed my mind. You see, I enjoy the fact that everyone looks different, and a world where everyone is the same would be incredibly boring. Think about that and get back to me.” I can always think of the most witty things to say, unfortunately it’s usually about 20 minutes too late. I notice this happens around girls a lot. Alright, sorry I’m rambling.

So those are some of my first adventures in the Rainier Valley. I look forward to many more. Oh, and I heard 4 gunshots last night. Don’t tell my mom.