You are racist

 

I’m liking the provocative titles.

Well, what do you think? Are you?

What I wrote about last time made me examine myself quite a bit. I actually think my description of how I am was not completely accurate. As I’ve thought about it more, and (over) analyzed myself in other situations, I’m not sure my problem is about race. It may be to some extent, as I think many people have prejudices and biases that are unconscious. I think the bigger problem is my judgment of other people based on what they look like, or even what they are talking about. When I am suspicious of other people, it’s mostly because they look a little sketchy to me. But that is wrong. How can I accurately evaluate someone’s character based on how they look?

 

I’ve known this guy for a little while, and when I was around him he seemed aloof and reserved. I interpreted this as arrogance. However as I’ve gotten to know him better, I realize that he’s just kind of a quiet and soft spoken, and really not arrogant at all. I feel like I’ve learned this lesson before. How many more times before I actually figure it out?

 

So I guess my point is that we make judgments about people far too quickly. A groundbreaking assessment I know, but its something I’ve been thinking about.

 

Ok, a couple more quick things. Funny story- so I gave my mom the website address for this blog (hi mom!). And then I wrote the last post. I’m so stupid sometimes.

 

Check out this band called Menomena- they’re great. Listen to Muscle N Flow. Its an amazing song. And one more link.

Some questions…

A wise man told me today that learning how to be in relationship with people teaches you how to be in relationship with God. When you learn how to trust people, or have faith in people, you can better practice those with God.

When I think about relationships I think about interactions. I think conversations, greetings, goodbyes. How do I look at that person? When I speak with them, am I concerned about what is going on in their lives, or do I want to talk about myself?

As I think more about it, this whole “relationship with God” thing is very confusing. How do I ask God how he’s doing? What can I offer God? How can I help God? You see, I show care by being concerned, by offering help. I can worship God, and I am assured that he takes pleasure in it. But, would God be worse off if I hadn’t worshipped him?

I thought about starting off this blog with a controversial rant about something like science and religion, but I started reading Blue Like Jazz and Don Miller inspired me to write down these thoughts. Or questions really.

I’ll end with this. Earlier in the quarter I was in a night class. I was tired and stressed, and the professor sensed that much of the class was in the same state. So she started class with prayer, and she said, “Picture yourself at the feet of Jesus, and take comfort in that.” I imagined myself with Jesus, first at his feet. But then, we were sitting outside chatting over coffee. I smiled to myself. And I felt an incredible amount of peace. I got this overwhelming feeling that chatting with Jesus would be the coolest thing ever, and some day I will have that experience. Can you imagine it? I look forward to sharing a meal with a favorite professor, but Jesus? That’s just amazing, incredible…

And to an extent, I can experience that now. I’m just trying to figure out how.